“Rest is a form of resistance because it disrupts and pushes back against capitalism and white supremacy” – The Nap Ministry (Tricia Hersey)
In the last couple weeks I have been taking a moment to slow down. This is actively challenging for me. I deeply love what I do, and I have ideas about art that can address injustice and activate community that come to me at 3 am and keep me up the rest of the night. I default to multitasking dinner preparation with podcast listening and texting and project idea brainstorms scratched on post it notes next to the stove.
Some of this is the natural rollercoaster of committing to living a creative life.
But as I have come to understand, some of the frantic energy I experience in my body and the feelings of needing to be productive all the time come from an unhealthy place. They come from a desire to prove myself as an artist, from a desire to feel worthy of my blessings, and to feel like I am doing “enough.”
I am learning to trust that other wisdoms can only emerge when we slow down, and that some of the urgent things I’m am working for require periods of rest, reflection, and quiet to fully take root.
Capitalism and white supremacy thrive by creating a culture where productivity determines value instead of recognizing the inherent value of all people (reference here goes to an amazing 4-part podcast called More Than Enough created by Mia Birdsong and The Nation Magazine. Also- check out The Nap Ministry IG where I saw the quote at the beginning).
Over a year ago in a moment of complete burnout, I read Do Less by Kate Northrup and I’ve been actively working towards a more healthy relationship with rest ever since. And ironically it has taken a lot of work to start to shift my habits and find ways to slow down. I made a pact with myself not to work in the evenings unless absolutely necessary and to stop multitasking.
Then COVID hit and there is frequently no other option than to work late into the night and care for kids while sending work emails and replying to texts and trying to keep it all afloat. Some days I’ve had to redefine rest to mean five minutes of intentionally sitting in the sun instead of replying to emails.
And it is nature that has consistently led me to find these moments of rest within myself.
I can close my eyes right now and imagine my feet sinking into soft sand with the cold Pacific ocean water surging over my ankles and the ocean air whirling past my cheeks and I physically feel my heart beat slow down.
I’m still early in this cultivation of rest as a deep and uncompromised part of my life. What is your relationship to rest like? What helps you slow down? I love hearing back from you if you feel inspired to respond.